Following the articles we have published in the past on Rapport, we are now looking at how people communicate and the different ways they communicate their message.
We already know that we are all different in terms of acting and that this sometimes brings us some problems when interacting with our customers who have a completely different style.
We have also seen the importance of adapting to the way others work to achieve a greater level of empathy.
Now I would like you to focus on the communication styles that each of us have.
How do you usually like to be presented the information you need?
In a more visual way?
With images, graphics or other visuals?
In a more auditory way?
Do you like it when someone explains to you verbally what you need to know?
In a more sensitive way?
Making you experience the processes that they are explaining to you?
Anyway, we all have preferences on how to receive the information we need.
If you analyse the way you usually communicate, you will see that you also do it in the way you like to receive the information.
The funny thing is that based on the 3 communication styles (Visual, Auditory or Sensitive), you can also have very important clues as to how that person works.
For example, visual people are often characterized by the following aspects:
- They are very dynamic when they speak, they have a normally high voice and a fast pace of speech;
- They don’t like to waste time on details;
- Their handshake is strong and confident;
- They are easily annoyed if the contents we are transmitting to them are not of interest to them;
- For them a picture is worth a thousand words;
- If we make them a scheme they understand much more easily the idea that we want to get across;
- They have greater need of safety distance;
- When we communicate with them, they like us to be direct, not to waste their time, and they want us to give them as many visual references as possible.
In short, “Tell me or show me what it looks like”, they need to see images or produce images from their experiences.
The auditory work differently:
- They have melodious voices and usually a nice timbre and rhythm;
- It’s important that things flow;
- They easily catch the lies because of the variations in the voice of the interlocutors;
- They are able to analyze the congruence of what is being said very easily;
- Sometimes they talk to themselves (internal dialogue);
- They tend to breathe in the middle of the chest. This gives them more oxygen to maintain a pleasant rhythm of conversation;
- They are not as stunted as the visuals or full of interruptions as the sensitive ones;
- They have medium handshakes, neither too strong nor “the fish type”;
- The images don’t mean anything to them, but what we are verbally communicating to them is analyzed syllable by syllable;
- They have an average safety distance.
In short, “Tell me or show me what it sounds like”, the auditory people need to hear sounds and verbalize their experiences.
Finally, the sensitives are more inclined to the following forms of action:
- They have deeper voices than the visual or auditory ones;
- The frequent pauses in the conversation allow them to analyze the emotions related to the subject that is being discussed;
- They have a soft handshake;
- They like to touch and feel things with their hands;
- They have less need of safety distance;
- It’s normal for them to touch us when they’re talking.
In summary, “Tell me or show me what it feels like”, sensitive people communicate while expressing physical sensations.
It’s necessary, however, to mention that no one is only visual, auditory or sensitive.
We all have components of each style in our personality. However, we tend to have a more dominant style and a more accessory style.
Especially in situations of stress, where we use our main style of defence.
A stress situation can be, for example, the first time a customer is faced with a salesperson.
If you want to check for yourself how this connects with Rapport, imagine a visual person, extremely dynamic and quick while speaking, communicating with a sensitive one, who is softer and has much slower speech, even if with very sharp pauses in speech.
What do you think is going to happen when the visual starts talking all fast?
Of course, the sensitive will soon begin to think:
“Bullocks, wait a little, I’ve only got the first words.”
And what about in the reverse case?
Now, can you imagine a sensitive trying to communicate with the visual?
“Oh my God, there’s so much to do and this guy never seems to go straight to the point. Come on, come on, I’ve figured out what you mean.”
In something as simple as this, a mere chat during the sale, we have a lack of empathy or Rapport due to their own communication styles.
Do you still think selling is simple?